Why Every Relationship Needs Sex Toys

Adult sex toys is a topic that is being discussed more and more these days. Thanks to the book Fifty Shades of Grey, more people are buying toys and admitting to using them. Did you know that about 45% of women ages 18-60 use vibrators? Did you also know that about 78% of those women use a vibrator with a partner?

Although the numbers don’t like, are you still one of those people who don’t understand why people use them? Do you feel that if you have an excellent sex life, why would your relationship need sex toys?

Nothing is perfect and your sex life can always improve and be even better. Adult toys help you spice up your relationship and have a more fun and interesting sex life. They also are the key to helping you and your partner express yourselves sexually.

More Sex

Everyone could use more sex and more enjoyable sex, right? We already know that sex helps you live longer, makes your heart and immune system healthier, reduces pain and stress, and improves sleep. Adult toys help couples have more sex in more adventurous and fun ways. If your sexual attitude is more playful, then your sexual relationship is more satisfying. Does that make sense?

Women’s Orgasms

About 75% of women can not orgasm through penetrative sex versus 90% of men who do. Using a toy during sex, such as a couples vibrator/couples sex toy or a vibrating penis ring, is one way to help the situation.

Faking Orgasms

If you ask men how many women they have been with you have faked an orgasm, most men will say none. This truth is that about 50% of women have faked an orgasm at least once.

If you incorporate sex toys into your sexual relationship, your chances of reaching an orgasm increase dramatically.

Let’s consider time. We are all very busy and not many of us can have marathon sex sessions every time we have sex. If she is lucky enough to orgasm through penetration, it could take up to 20 minutes. If she were to use a luxury vibrator, it could take a few minutes.

Premature Ejaculation

Many men experience premature ejaculation. The Mayo Clinic suggests that one in three men or about 30% of men experience PE. A helpful way to fight premature ejaculation is with sex toys for men and sex accessories. For example, penis rings help restrict the blood flow from leaving the penis. Male desensitizers are designed to have him feel less sensation and delay ejaculation to prolong sex.

Everyone Orgasms

Unfortunately, many men forget about their partner’s needs. The key to the best sex is that is should include an orgasm for each partner. This should be the goal every time you have sex. Sex toys can help you reach your goal and cross the finish line… together.

It’s OK to use sex toys with a partner and using toys should not hurt your partner’s feelings. Sex toys are objects and not a real substitute for a real person.

Make sure to communicate with your partner how important each person’s orgasm is. The “hows” should not matter as much as they “whys.”

She Hates Her Body

Many women are embarrassed about their body, which can sometimes lead to intimacy issues. Using sex toys during mutual masturbation can reduce the anxiety of nakedness and help create more intimacy.

If you are ready to begin using sex toys, please make sure to read my other article: How to Introduce Sex Toys in the bedroom.

Have fun and remember that experimentation never hurt anyone!

My Secret Luxury is the provider of luxury adult toys and high quality romance tools. We offer a curated collection of sex toys for men, women and couples that adhere to the highest standards of design, style and technology.

We called the Lucknow call girls Services presented two years ago, we had a plan from the beginning, any kind, any sexual desire no longer being incomplete.


Pornography As a Turn-On for Fun-Driven Adult Sex

Adventurous couples can buy a pornographic video and watch it together. That is generally a surefire way to end up in bed. In fact, it is usually when couples are in bed that they watch such films. And if the film is a good one they will enjoy being turned on as they watch it. Many couples find that the provocative content stimulates them to duplicate what is being viewed. They are impulsively driven to touch each other, kid around, mimic the sex acts, and swing from the imagined chandelier as they tickle each other’s fancy.

In many countries in the world, including most industrialized ones, pornography is not banned or hidden from view. For example, at King’s Cross district in Sydney, Australia a section of the city is designated to show and sell pornography Sex oriented videos, DVDs, books, sex toys, lubricants, assumed aphrodisiacs, are sold in kiosks and stores. Strip clubs, restaurants, massage parlors and other clubs are available to meet members of the opposite sex.

In Europe, in many countries, and cities pornography is not hidden and thus available for adults. In all the countries there are restrictions to the sale of pornography to children and prosecution of offenders is open and continuous.

In the US pornography is not banned from sale to adults although there is no tolerance on anyone abusing the Child Pornography laws.

But for the purpose of improving the sex life of adults pornography has a place for some. Do you have to be lonely or hard-up to use porn? The answer is No. Porn can be a substitute for sex for many lonely and sex starved adults, mainly men, and for adults without a partner who like visual stimulation for self-arousal.

Finally, let’s examine whether pornography can fit into the armamentarium of the average adult who wishes for increased stimulation for lovemaking. What can porno offer?
As with any movie there is added stimulation by watching real pictures compared to imaging such scenes. Some porno videos actually tell a reasonable story where there is more than just sexual exploitation. So some selection is necessary. Google is a good resource to discover what are considered the best sex videos made in the past few decades.

Beside adding visual stimulation couples can mimic what they see, learn about new positions, empathize with the excitement of the sex partners, imagine participating in the viewed sex, experience sex beyond their own interests, such as gay, bi, S and M, bondage, oral and anal sex, and the use of fetishes. Some show dancing, foreplay that could be stimulating and perhaps above all can act as a stimulus to open the viewers to become freer and lustier about sex.

If you attempt to try out the benefits of sex videos and it is new to you imagine becoming an adventurer and explorer so you don’t take a negative bias into your viewing. An open mind will allow you to gain what might be there for you. At the very worst it won’t have any effect on you and may even turn you off. If so, just chalk it up as another interesting experience.

To determine if pornography may be a stimulus for your personal sex life approach its use openly. It might be a new vehicle for greater enjoyment of sex for occasional use or even frequent use. Remember adults have no restrictions on what they mutually do and prefer behind closed doors. So enjoy the movies and enjoy the sex and know you have taken another step to gaining a new stimulus for sex and love.

by Marvin H. Berenson, M.D. July 12, 2011

To discover new and effective ways to have a wonderful, romantic love life and to become a great lover, my book “Love and Sex” offers frank and wide-reaching information. You will find a truly in-depth look at what actually happens during sex and how to overcome sexual difficulties. By reading this book you can change your love life.

7 Tips on Visiting Sex Websites, If You Must

1) Avoid using your real name. In fact, you should avoid using even the name of a friend, a relation or your pet. Invent an unlikely username or alias.

2) which has your employer’s name in it. Create a special e-mail account that you will only use at adult websites. For example, use Hotmail or Gmail. They are both anonymous, free and cannot be traced back to you.

3) Always read a website’s policy on privacy and the terms of its service. Those pages should tell you how the site will handle your personal information or your request for a refund. Be on the alert if a site’s policy or terms page is too long, too short, vague, unnecessarily legal-sounding or if it contains errors.

4) Whenever possible, use an anonymous service like PayPal to make payments on the internet. If I stopped you in the street and asked for your credit card details, you wouldn’t give them to me. Likewise, if you must pay by credit card or through a bank account, you should find out something about the website beforehand. Also acquaint yourself with its payment policy. For example, if you plan to make recurring payments, be aware of the frequency at which the site will bill your card or your bank account. It might not look good for your monthly statement to contain a dozen transactions of an erotic nature. Find out, in advance, how payments will show up in your statement.

5) If you order erotic goods, use a post box or secret shipping address rather than your home or work address.

6) Never visit adult websites at your office or workplace. Unless, of course, you are in the adult business yourself.

7) After you visit an adult website, delete the contents of your browser’s cookie, cache and history folders. You can easily find out how to do so from the Internet Explorer website, the Firefox website, and so on.

How To Introduce Sex Toys In The Bedroom

Now that Fifty Shades of Grey is so popular, all of the media is talking about sex and sex toys. Are you curious about trying them but are too embarrassed? Are you unsure whether they are right for you and your relationship?

The following are some common misconceptions about adult toys:

Most people don’t use sex toys

Wrong! Many respectable people use adult toys, including people most would consider perfectly normal. Using an adult toy doesn’t make you “odd” or doesn’t say anything negative about your relationship. It just helps you have fun more fun in the bedroom! You don’t have to share with your friends, your boss or your mother that you use toys unless anyone unless you want to.

Sex toys are just for masturbation.

While adult toys are commonly used for masturbation, many couples enjoy using toys together, whether they are female or male or heterosexual or homosexual. Usually these couples are comfortable trying new things together, are open-minded, and trusting.

Your partner will feel inadequate if you start using a sex toy.

Are you nervous that if you bring an adult toy into the bedroom, it will hurt your partner’s feelings? An adult toy can give you an orgasm, but it can’t tell you how much they love you or rub your back. An object is not a substitute for a real person. If your lover has this fear, be sensitive and stroke his or her ego a little bit. As with most relationship issues, good communication is key.

Using sex toys can be physically dangerous.

NO WAY!

In fact, adult toys can have very positive effects on your sexual health.

For example, many doctors and therapists recommend adult toys to women who have trouble reaching orgasm; if you suffer from painful sex, vibrators can stimulate blood flow; all women can benefit from kegel exercisers or kegel balls to tone the pelvic floor muscles; prostate massagers reduce the risk of prostate cancer, erectile dysfunction and frequent nighttime urination. Lastly, orgasms help you live longer, block pain and, some say, look younger. Who wouldn’t want that?

If you use sex toys too much, you won’t have an orgasm with your partner.

If your partner is afraid you’ll replace him or her with your favorite toy, promise him or her that you’ll always keep things different in the bedroom: try different positions, new toys, light bondage and fantasy play.

If your relationship is healthy, there’s no reason why you should need a sex toy.

You are so lucky to have a healthy relationship. However, who wouldn’t want to make their relationship even stronger and closer by sharing a new experience? If your lover is insistent about not wanting to use an adult toy to spice up your sex life, assure him or her that you don’t need an adult toy either, you’d just like to try one.

You or your partner is afraid of feeling pleasure

Pleasure is a birthright. Everyone deserves it and should have it. Own your sexuality and do what works for you. After all, orgasms make you healthier and happier.

Buying sex toys can be really embarrassing especially because they look gross and scary.

You are right. Now, thanks to the Internet, you can shop in the comfort of your own home without judgement. Most adult toys make you feel uncomfortable because they are usually phallic or cheesey or are so loud that you think your children or neighbor might hear what you are up to. Luxury sex toys are just the opposite. You might not even realize that they are high quality adult toys because they look like art. They are now so discreet and quiet that no one will know what you are up to.

These arguments might make sense and work for most people but might not work for you. If that’s the case, here are 3 more reasons to try out sex toys:

Pleasure = Sex Toys

Who is not a fan of orgasms? You might be too tired or too busy to have sex, but there’s no denying that orgasms feel good. Adult toys can help you have more orgasms. What’s wrong with that?

Sex Toys are Fun.

Whether you have been with your lover for a few months or many years, things might be a little stale and you want to try something new. That’s OK – you are not alone! Adult toys can add excitement to the bedroom and keep things from getting mundane. Using an adult toy together can bring you closer; sharing new experiences together can be very intimate.

Sex Toys Make Sex Better.

Did you know that about 30% of women actually have an orgasm during sex? Most women need clitoral stimulation to achieve an orgasm. Meanwhile, many men have trouble sustaining their erections as long as they would like, whether it be because of age, medication or stress. That’s what adults toys are for!

If you are now ready to start using adult toys, here are a few suggestions to get started:

Start slow by starting out with something small. Start with a small toy and show your lover that the toy is all about adding more pleasure and excitement to the bedroom. For example, if you want to try a vibrator, start with something that’s small and discreet, like a finger vibrator or vibrating egg. If you want to try light bondage, try a blindfold or holding your lover’s hands above their head during foreplay.

When you are ready, work your way up to something bigger and bolder.

Above all else, remember that communication is the key to any healthy relationship. If you can’t share your feelings or desires, something is not right. Intimacy and fun are the main goal. It is entirely up to you to decide whether that means with or without sex toys, but experimentation never hurt anyone!

Talking Your Way To Great Sex

This is an edited interview with Dr. Lori Buckley and Thomas Haller.

Dr. Lori Buckley: Today we are going to be talking about how to improve your intimacy and your sex life.

Dr. Lori: The first thing I want to ask is what do you mean by “great relationship”?

Thomas Haller : What we’re working towards is knowing that there is an undeniable link between the words that we use in a relationship and the level of connectedness that anybody has in that relationship, that the way that we relate to one another is a large portion how we interact, but it’s also in what we say to our partner and how we say it. So then, I’m not going to define what’s great for you in your relationship. You get to define that, and what you think is great under your definitions, and you don’t get to do that solely on your own, because it is a relationship, so you define that with your partner, and decide, “what is great for us, and how to we feel good and connected together?” And, but, how do you do that? You have to do that through communication.

Dr. Lori Buckley : That was exactly my question. Because, because I love what you’re saying, “connectedness.” I mean, that’s a beautiful thing. But I know a lot of couples have trouble having any kind of communication. How do they even bring up that subject, about, how, how do we have this great relationship, and how do we even define what that is? What are some ways to even just bring the first step up?

Thomas Haller : Well, I, you know, as you begin to communicate, you have to talk about yourself. What, who am I, and what do I know about me, and what do I like, and what do I enjoy? So I have to be pretty clear about who I am as a person. And so, sometimes I might have to do some self-exploration to discover who I am, and get better at knowing me, and when I can know me, then I can communicate that to my partner: these are, these are the things that I like, these are the things I that don’t like, this is where I like to be touched, this is how I like to sleep, this is where I like to snuggle, this is how I like to love, or be loved, okay? So I have to know that about me first, and then I can ask my partner, I can solicit information from them, I can offer information to them. And what we find out in the communication process is that often times there’s one person that tends to communicate better than the other. So if we’re just going to go after communicating, and let’s get this couple better at communicating with one another, you’re going to raise both their levels of communication, but there’s still going to be this divergency [sic] between who communicates better and who doesn’t. You’ve got to create some balance between that. And so, that’s what we want to start with, how, ways that we can begin to see my partner as someone who can give back something about themselves in this process.

Dr. Lori Buckley: So the first thing is that you have to clear about what you want, sexually, non-sexually in the relationship, how you want to be loved. We know that that can be a challenge, but once you discover that, then you want to be able to talk about that with your partner by saying, you know, “I really like this” and “I want that.” Do you find that there are–and I guess I’m going to be a little stereotypical here, because I think it’s probably them men more often than not, but it could be the women, too, who might get a little offended or defensive, thinking that when their partner is saying, you know, “I want this,” or “I want more of this,” they feel like they, or they may be hearing something else, like, “well, you’re not giving me this” or “you’re not good enough”?

Thomas Haller: Well, we…let’s throw this all the way back to Socrates for a minute, when Socrates was really big in asking questions in philosophy, he…we started under that premise that it’s better to seek first information from somebody else, seek to understand, and try to get information, before trying to be understood. So you don’t start from the position in communication–and particularly when I talk about this in the book, Couple Talk–that you want to ask more than say, initially. So I’m going to seek to understand you first. I already know me. Now I don’t know you. So now, let’s…even if you’ve been together in a relationship for a number of years, we change, as we develop and go through developmental stages, so I continually want to know my partner and where they’re at at any given moment. And in that, it creates opportunities for my partner, then, to know me back. But first I’m going to seek to understand her.

Dr. Lori Buckley: That is really great advice. I’m just imagining as a woman what that would feel like having a man partner taking his time and really wanting to understand you, and know exactly what you like and what you don’t like, and the things that you, that you want. I would love to be asked what is it that, that you would like, how would you like me to love you, what can I do to make you happy? And I think that that comes with just everyday conversation, or when, when a woman is feeling distressed or disconnected in some way. I’m wondering what you want to say about that.

Thomas Haller: Certainly one of the initial steps that I talk with men about is that, we don’t want to get caught up in all the theory. There are specific phrases that you can use. How it works is you don’t have to worry about, oh, how am I doing, oh, what if I didn’t do it that way. You just say the phrase. So, so one of them that’s a really key initial phrase for men to use–and it works with women, as well, so I don’t mean to just be one-sided here, but, you know, we are on a show for men, so–I would say, “How can I be most helpful right now?” So that when my wife walks in the door, she’s–my wife’s a kindergarten teacher of eighteen years. And she comes walking in the door, and she’s got a particular look on her face. And I can guess at what that is, I mean, I have a pretty good inclination, because we’ve been together for awhile, however, I don’t know what to do with how she’s feeling or where she’s at. I want to find out. How can I be most helpful right now? What role would you like me to play? In the communication process, do you need to just, like, offload, and dump on me? Do you just want me to take, like, the sounding-board position, where you’re just going to go, “Bleh!” and just, bam bam…and I don’t do anything with it, but just let you dump. Maybe you need to do that. I also want to…but maybe, maybe you need someone who’s going to do–typically they call it, it’ll be like, brainstorming. I call that soulstorming. I want to soulstorm with my…I want to get into the emotional parts and just ask her some questions around how she felt about that, or how did that affect her, you know, when the parent confronted her that way. And, is that my role? Am I the soulstormer? Or, am I the problem-solver? Well…and then I get into asking particular questions, like, well, how, what would be a way that you would like to work through that, or how did you feel when this happened, and what if you did it this other way? And we’re just kind of, you know, going around the issue as sort of, looking at the problem from different points of view. Or maybe, the last one that I have men think about in the role to play is, am I just the fixer? Do you need me, is this one of those where you’d kind of like me to just get it done, to do it, to take care of this one for you? You know like, I live on a horse rescue and retirement ranch, and so, you know, my–sometimes the horses get a little, you know, rough, or they’ll break a fence, they’ll get through. And my wife comes in all frazzled. She just, sometimes she just needs me to go take care of that, so that she can, you know, take care of these other things that she’s feeling more concerned about. I don’t know that, so I’m going to find that out first.

Dr. Lori Buckley: Yeah. And what I love about this is it’s such a great model, because we know that men typically like to fix things, they want to make us happy. I know that. You know, ultimately that’s the intention, although it doesn’t always come across that way because often times men are just so quick to fix it the way that they want to fix it, or love us the way that they want to love us. So in this sense, we’re all getting what we need, because the man is able to help us and make us happy, but in a way that he finds out exactly how to do it.

Thomas Haller: Yeah. Now you’re focusing it down to when we get into loving situations and making love. I want to know what you want in this moment. Yes, we’ve been together for 15 years and I know the right moves to push your buttons and enable you to have an orgasm, but maybe that’s not what you want in this moment. So I have to be willing to say, how can I be most helpful right now? What role would you like me to play in the lovemaking process? Or in the…is it cuddling?

Thomas Haller: I tell men this all the time that come into my office, and I say, look, let’s just get cut right to the chase. You want to have sex with your wife tonight, you start in the morning. How you talk to your wife all day long and the connectedness that you work towards creating all day long will pay off later in the evening. And how, because, where she starts is emotionally, and her desire kicks in after she’s emotionally comfortable. Well, if she’s been emotionally uncomfortable with you all day long, she’s not going to just click over and become emotionally comfortable. So think about that as you communicate, not always with what you say, but often times how you say it.

Dr. Lori Buckley: What do you mean by that?

Thomas Haller: Okay. Well, you know that, it’s…sometimes it’s in your tone. If you have a certain tone to, [harshly] “Well, what do you want me to do right now?” Or [gently] “What would you like me to do right now?” It’s a little bit different, in how it’s just presented. Or, [harshly] “Can you just take care of the kids for a minute?” Or [gently] “I’m busy over here, and I’m just finishing this. Can you quiet down the kids for me for a moment.”

Dr. Lori Buckley: That’s, that’s really a critical thing, because some people don’t even realize–they’re so in their own emotions, they don’t even realize how it’s coming across sometimes.

Thomas Haller: So that, so that’s, yes, how you’re going to begin. So we have to stay very mindful, for awhile, and as men we have to continue to sort of practice some of the phrases, think about our tone, think about our attitude towards the, our partner, beyond the stuff we’re into for the day. How are they into their day? And then, in the evening, as the evening comes around we can begin to say, how would, how would you like to create more closeness? We’ve created a time for, you know, that…we have adult time at our house. I have a 10-year-old and a 7-year-old, and there is a certain time at which, whether they’re asleep or not, they’re up in their rooms, because now it is our time to have adult time. I’m going to capture some time when we can snuggle, or we can even be sexual, and I don’t want to be interrupted. And they begin to know this as kids.

Dr. Lori Buckley: Okay, now this is something that is so important, because I hear from so many couples, “Oh, we have children and we just can’t.” And, and what you’re saying I agree with, just, a hundred percent. But we have to throw in a little reality here. Sounds like you’re doing it, and I know our listeners want to know, okay, how do you do that? How do you, I don’t know, teach them or show your children or get them to understand that you have this adult time and that they are not going to interrupt you. I mean, just, if you could just talk about that for awhile, that’s so important.

Thomas Haller: So you start this at any age, and you start this right now, on letting your children know that, I have a tremendous amount of focus on you. And my job is to help you learn about the world. It’s not my job to punish you through this, it’s my job to teach you through it. So I’m going to teach you some things. One of the things that I want to help you learn is that there comes a time when adults need to do adult things. And so, I don’t have to answer a lot, I don’t have to answer specific questions–depending on the age that your children are at, and teens, it gets a little bit different. But I do want to begin to set what we’d call some boundaries around how you can just invade everybody else’s space. We have personal space, we have, we’ve created a space for them, we created…and so, we have created adult space, too. So, we may, my wife and I may just choose to…the traditional thing that we like to do, the…is the way that we begin our connection, because as a therapist I work well into the evening when people are out of work, so I don’t get home sometimes til, you know, nine o’clock at night, and my wife greets me with a big bowl of popcorn and something to drink, and we just sit down, and I connect with the kids. And then after that, they–unless it’s an emergency–they stay away. And we begin the connecting with just sharing popcorn, talking about the day, talking about her experiences, my experiences, what were some high points of your day, what low points of your day, what were some ways that we could create a next-time opportunity so if there was a low point, we could stop that low point from happening. Do you see how I’m building connectedness? We haven’t even talked about sex yet, but guess who starts feeling real sexual towards me as I’m engaging in this process. My wife.

Dr. Lori Buckley: Yeah, I love it. And all what you’re saying is, it fits right in, and you’re saying this exact same thing, I’m just going to put it in different words, but that men typically have sex that connects them to their women. You know, that’s something, that’s a way that they connect. Women work a little bit differently. And that, you know, again, I know these are blankets, general statements, but for the most part, women need to feel emotionally connected and cared for before they desire sex. Before they want to, they want to please you and be with you in that way. And so what you were talking about, it’s just, it’s really quite brilliant, I love the idea with the kids, too, because you’re creating not only these boundaries for your children–and what I’m hearing is, probably the earlier you start that, the better, and being real clear about that–but you’re also modeling really loving, effective adult relationships.

Thomas Haller: So now we can take that same concept, that same idea of boundaries that we just talked about with my children, and now I put that in with my relationship. What are some boundaries that my partner has, and what are some boundaries that I have when we connect? There are some ways that I don’t particularly like to be touched. Well, I need to be able to communicate that to you. There are particular ways that you do like to be touched, and I don’t, I’m not doing it quite right. Well, we need to just open that right up and say, please touch me like this, please touch me here, or, hold me for awhile, this is…wait, stop, you’re going too fast, this is where I like to go nice and slow, through this part of our…whatever that is that you’re going through. But we have to be able to know that about ourselves, and then know the boundary, and where it can open up. And sometimes it’s like an accordion, then. Sometimes my boundaries are a little bit different today than they were yesterday. So I’m going to communicate that to my partner, and she’s going to communicate that back.

Dr. Lori Buckley: So that’s why you have to keep communicating. This is not just a one-shot deal.

Thomas Haller: Right. Once we’re, once we, we’re going to focus it right back down to talking about a sexual relationship–once we start in the sexual play or that part of the process, which I don’t mean just sexual intercourse, I mean that whole intimacy part–we want to be communicating all the way through that, and, even if it is through sex, we want to talk right through it all. That doesn’t mean you have to jibber the whole time through it all, but hey, if that works for you, go for it. But we want to be able to say, through that, where I’m at, what I like, what I don’t like, where are you at, what you like, what you don’t like, or how can we do this different, and continue to just move through that process always using our verbal skills, and it opens up that pathway of connectedness.

Dr. Lori Buckley: Yeah, and what you’re talking about, I mean, what we’ve talked about today so far, which is the couple talk, and the connectedness, and how that happens out of bed, how that happens in bed, how it happens as parents and as partners, is such wonderful information. And I love it, I know our listeners are going to get a lot out of it. I just want to ask you a couple more questions before we have to wrap up. One, I’m just wondering for you, in your experience, in your professional and your personal experience, what mistakes do you think men make the most often in relationships?

Thomas Haller: I think one of the key mistakes is that they make assumptions. They make assumptions about what they think their partner feels or knows or at any given moment is thinking, and I call that the myth of the glass head. I don’t know what you’re thinking, and I can’t see in your head to see the thoughts coming out, either, so I have to move past making assumptions and put that over onto my partner, and say, what…and that’s where I’m, again, seeking first to understand now, I’m trying to draw from her where she’s at and what’s going on in her head, and how can I stay open to receiving whatever it is.

Dr. Lori Buckley: So don’t assume. I think also what falls into that, I talk about connections sometimes, and how we think that because we’ve been with our partner for so many years or so many months, that we know everything about them, and we assume we know everything about them, and the truth is, we never do. So we always want to be interested in learning more about them, because there really is more to learn.

Read This Before Downloading Any Adult Sex Guide

The online world is actually inundated with adult sex guides. Just try searching for them on your favorite search engine and you are going to see such a lot of them waiting for you. They are all priced differently according to what they are supposed to contain and they contain different things as well. But, the point is, do you really need an adult sex guide?

The question you have to ask yourself is why you are looking for such a book to help you. Definitely the answer is that you are looking at improving your sexual performance. You are looking at giving your woman greater pleasure in bed. And you are hoping that the tantalizing sex guide you are looking forward to download will help you with it.

But, the fact is, no sex guide can help you if you don’t help yourself. These are some points you have to consider beforehand.

1. Good sex doesn’t come without a good equation with your partner. Yes, there are books that will train you in the pure art of carnal sex, but if you are in a long term committed relationship, then such a book won’t help you. Probably you will need a book that will tell you how to construct a better relationship with your partner than just some meaningless sex.

2. If you indulge in a great deal of foreplay, you can arouse your woman immensely. This is something that can really help you in what lies ahead. Maybe you won’t need the adult sex guide to spice up your act after that.

3. Another thing you have to consider is that you will need to actually implement the things that are mentioned in the guide if you want it to be effective for you. You cannot just read the book and then not implement it. Then it would be a futile exercise. In all probability the book is going to tell you about how you can have some more daring sexual experiences to make things more exciting-you have to be able to use that.

These are some of the things that you have to consider before downloading any adult sex guide. Will you be able to do it? That’s the question you have to answer.

How to Carefully Approach Adult Sex Dating

I think there comes a point when we have to stop being a society in denial. The internet is a place of all sorts and adult sex dating is one of the realities of the internet-dating world. Not everyone is looking for a relationship and not everyone is looking for a date to spend the night. There are some of us with a clear understanding of exactly what they want in life and I think I can applaud them for being honest with themselves. Dating sites that are specific about their intent and their demographic are quite readily available online, with varying names – some famous and some not.

They also are quite a few that cater to very specific sexual and niche interests, I mean the world is made up of all sorts and the internet has allowed them to find a place in the world where they can find like minded individuals who would be able to share their same likes and dislikes. Some of us have higher libidos than other’s and are much more comfortable with our own sexualities. This is the driving force behind these websites and dating services. It isn’t because that society has become perverted and that they need to run to the corners of the digital world to see their interests expressed.

It is much the other way around. Some of us have matured more than others and we need to see that human are murals of expression and we are built with different colours of the human spectrum. We cannot always have a negative thought to those who are honest about themselves, we cannot treat them as outcasts of society just because we cannot understand them. We must be patient, we must be accepting, we must be enlightened. Yes the adult sex dating scene is a dangerous world with potential stalkers and nefarious beings but these dating sites are pretty secure in their treatment of their subject matter. Privacy is at an all time high and the quality websites filter all the potential malware, scams, pornographic companies that try to infiltrate their databases to garner more business. Adult sex dating is all about the physical relationship and the discovery of both pleasure and physical attraction. But this does not mean that it cannot be pure.

There are those who will take advantage of the system and there are those who are in it because it is a part of their lifestyle. Normally, the end users of these websites will be able to weed out these individuals and get them banned. There are quite a few quality adult sex dating sites online and you can spot them because of the fact that they are discreet, offer a comprehensive security warning, have many pages of disclaimers and require that you complete and fill out a personal particulars form before you continue – one that has to be verified through email. These precautions and more are there to keep out the black hats and make adult sex dating a safer experience for those who would like to find an avenue to express themselves.